Merry Oscar Nominations Mornings To You! Or… NOT
I celebrate Oscar nominations morning like a holiday. At Lionsgate, being on the East Coast, we would get Dunkin Donuts and coffee and come into the office at 8 am to watch the noms in the conference room and then send out the email to the LA-ers. I always get happy and giddy the night before. I even bought fixings for banana pancakes to celebrate in case I couldn’t go back to sleep. This morning, my alarm went off at 5:25 am and I pulled my laptop and iphone under the covers with me to fire up the live stream and twitter.
Firstly, I was very amused by the guy who came out to do the “sound check” and give “instructions.” My favorite instruction was when he said “you have to be out of the parking garage by 7:30.” Geez, guy, let a brother take a moment? Also, Jennifer Lawrence’s top was horrible and she looked half naked.
As they rattled off the noms, I was sort of amused by how the Academy loves to throw in surprises (gotta love the gasps in the room), but then my foggy brain realized the travesty that had just unfolded. NO FASSBENDER. NO THERON. NO MOTHERFUCKING TILDA SWINTON. I felt as though my heart had been ripped out. “We Need To Talk About Kevin,” is in my opinion, the best movie of 2011 and “Shame” and “Drive” are tied for second. “Young Adult” is up there, and so is “Martha Marcy May Marlene.” Elizabeth Olsen’s performance is perfection. Lynne Ramsay shits out ideas for films better than the dreck nommed for Best Picture. This is the first year I have really felt the Academy’s age. They are so out of touch. They go for the traditional, old fashioned bio-pic crap and nominate Meryl Streep and Glenn Close and Michelle Williams just for making a movie this year. Then they try to be hip and with it and nominate Melissa McCarthy for Supporting. Listen, I really enjoyed “Bridesmaids” and I think the screenplay nom is deserving. But, the Supporting nom feels like overcompensation to me. God, they are really so old and boring and out of touch. But to snub Fass????? That was the best male performance of the year. AND TILDA? That one burns the most. I won’t get to see her looking amazing at the show. And look at how buddies she is with Clooney! They are the most adorable and should co-host the show in matching tuxedos.
Anyway, I got some consolation from two of my favorite cultural commentators Natasha-Vargas Cooper and Richard Rushfield on the topic, though they and I disagree on “Melancholia,” which I consider overrated and wack as hell. But, it is a well-made, interesting film, and Kirsten Dunst is amazing in Part 1. Part 2’s stupid LVT stupidness just ruined it for me. Come on guys, that is a really bad and stupid and wack ending.
I just wanted to share my favorite quotes from their posts. NVC’s post is entirely made up of quotable quotes so you should really go and read the whole thing. RR’s is just so insightful and explains a lot.
NVC: ” Also, what kind of belt-studded self harm is David Fincher indulging in right now? Do you think he left hateful messages on Rooney Mara’s voicemail when he got snubbed? Is she starving somewhere, shaking? Yes.”
“YOU NOMINATED JUNO BUT NOT YOUNG ADULT? *self harms*”
RR: “But in the end those awards just felt awkward, like your drunk old uncle grabbing the mike and freestyling at his daughter’s wedding.”
“Just icky, saccharin grotesquerie.”
Go read and enjoy in order to keep your RAGE in check!
